Good enough parent

For the full context of this post read Jeremiah 1:4-8.

I recall learning about Winnicott’s theory of the “good enough mother” (1953) when I first began studying human development. I was not a parent at the time, but the concept that parents were not meant to be perfect changed the way I viewed the parents of the children I worked with. In my years of parenting I have often reminded myself that although I am far from perfect, I am good enough. Parenting is hard! It’s thankless, and it hurts. I don’t know any parents who feel like they have it all together all the time. We question ourselves. We question our children. We wonder if we’re really cut out for the work that God has for us. Listen to what God told the prophet Jeremiah:

5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,

before you were born I set you apart (Jeremiah 1:5a, NIV).

God knew us before he formed us. He set us apart. God has a plan for each of us. If God knew my children before he formed them, and he still selected me to be their parent, I am a part of the plan that God has for my children. He selected me. Likewise, he selected my parents to parent me, and their parents to parent them, and so on. Before God formed my children, he picked me. There was no mix up in the hospital! There was no mistake. I was chosen to parent my children, and if you are a parent, you were chosen to parent your children. God knows we can do this.

I am in awe of the responsibility God has given me. I don’t always get it right, but here’s what I know. I am good enough. I was selected by God to parent my children. I will love them fiercely knowing that God deemed me good enough to be a part of their stories.

Winnicott, D. W. (2005). Playing and reality (7th ed). Taylor and Francis.